I have been in a serious, commited lesbian relationship for almost 7 years. We are domestic partners and talk about getting married when that's legalized. I think we are experiencing "lesbian bed death". I cannot remember the last time we made love. I have tried to make advances and suggestions, but after alot of rejection, I feel insecure now. In the past, she has said that she doesn't feel sexy because she is fat, and she doesn't like it when I call her "sexy". I think she's beautiful the way she is. She is older than me by 14 years. She does not think we have a problem, and I used to agree, but I'm realizing that my sexual fantasy life is so huge, that I must be suppressing my sexual urges in our relationship. So, how do I let her know that we do have an "issue" when I have been so complacent in the past. We have been to therapy together for a different problem, but she felt resentful(it was I who brought up the problem). How do I broach this without totally freaking her out? Until then, I just live in my little fantasy world.
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