A few weeks ago, I found out what an ex-girlfriend from 27 years ago had been up to all this time. She has been married for 23 years, has 4 kids and lives in the next suburb over. I ended the relationship 27 years ago because I could not take the cheating and sharing her with other men. She was my first love (I was 27) and my first intimate girlfriend. There were good times too and I even briefly lived with her about 1/2 way into our time together. What really seemed to doom our relationship was when she got pregnant and decided to terminate the pregnancy. I had wanted to get married. About 10 years after ending this relationship I met a wondeful women, fell in love and we have been happily married for 16 years and we have two teenage daughters, a beautiful home, both of us have great jobs, but I find myself suffering anxiety attacks and being kept up at night with thoughts of what could have been with my old girlfriend and feeling loss at what our life could have been together. I don't want to contact her, I don't want to leave my wife or family, I just want to put this woman back into the box in my memory where she was not bothering me so much and get on with my life. How do I accomplish that?
THE ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION WILL NOT BE DISPLAYED UNTIL YOU HAVE INDICATED YOUR AGREEMENT WITH THE DISCLAIMER PRINTED JUST BELOW. CLICK THE 'I AGREE' BUTTON TO AGREE TO THESE TERMS AND SEE THE RESPONSE.
Dr. Schwartz responds to questions about psychotherapy and mental health problems, from the perspective of his training in clinical psychology.
Dr. Schwartz intends his responses to provide general educational information to the readership of this website; answers should not be understood to be specific advice intended for any particular individual(s).
Questions submitted to this column are not guaranteed to receive responses.
No correspondence takes place.
No ongoing relationship of any sort (including but not limited to any form of professional relationship) is implied or offered by Dr. Schwartz to people submitting questions.
Dr. Schwartz, Mental Help Net and CenterSite, LLC make no warranties, express or implied, about the information presented in this column. Dr. Schwartz and Mental Help Net disclaim any and all merchantability or warranty of fitness for a particular purpose or liability in connection with the use or misuse of this service.
Always consult with your psychotherapist, physician, or psychiatrist first before changing any aspect of your treatment regimen. Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician.