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Trying to Reconnect With My ExTue, Jul 19th 2011I was hoping you can help.
My girlfriend and I were dating for almost 4 years before we broke up. We were living together and everything was fine. We even have a 3 year old daughter. I guess, according to what I can find out, I have "Peter Pan Syndrome."
In the last year or so in our relationship I starting going out too much and hanging out with my friends a lot more. I would leave them at home while I would have "fun." I would always ask her if I could go out and she would say that she didn't mind, or she would give me a simple no.
Things got worse and worse. When she traveled to Boston, I had nothing to do but go out with my friends. I will admit that I do flirt with other girls, but NOTHING comes out of it. I always knew that I'm going home alone and thats that! Well, she looked through my cell phone and saw text messages between my friend and I about me dancing with some other girl and how he and I were joking about it. She wasn't happy. She said that this was the last straw and she broke up with me.
Now, here we are 5 months later and I am trying to work things out. It didn't help my case one bit that I would go out every weekend after she and I broke up and I partied all the time, (But, nothing out of control to where it becomes a drinking problem).
She is saying that she has issues trusting me and that she will never know if this will work. My main concern is our daughter. I don't want her to be raised without both parents and yes, I do love my ex a lot!
I want this to work out between us. For the past month and a half I have been over at my old house, (She lives there now with our daughter), and I'm spending a lot more time. She is more accepting of me touching her, (Rubbing her back, scratching her head), but nothing sexual. I feel that something is going in the right direction, and, when I ask her, she still says that she doesn't know, and that is the confusing part.
Am I reading too much into all of this? I want to go to counseling with her, but, she doesn't have the time because she has a very busy work schedule. I keep asking her to get something going, but to no avail.
What can I do to get her to know that this can work again? I really don't want my daughter raised by anybody else but us two. I am honestly trying my hardest to stop going out. I haven't been going out since I started hanging out with her more.
What are my options? I sometimes feel we are moving in the right direction, but sometimes I feel dead in the water. THE ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION WILL NOT BE DISPLAYED UNTIL YOU HAVE INDICATED YOUR AGREEMENT WITH THE DISCLAIMER PRINTED JUST BELOW. CLICK THE 'I AGREE' BUTTON TO AGREE TO THESE TERMS AND SEE THE RESPONSE.
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